What is "Grace enough" - for my own heart; for others?

"Grace enough"...For My Own heart

February 5, 2020 excerpt from my spiritual journal

"Jesus came to his home town, and his disciples followed him."  Mark 6:1

Jesus comes to my heart; and I follow him there.  He speaks to me what is best for me, giving me guidance, and comforts me.  When Peace reigns in my heart, I know he is there.  And in times of trial and tribulation, even then I know His Presence, I know he is there.  Else I would not stand.  I am able to walk through the difficult times because he reigns in my heart.  I watch, I guard my heart.  Why would I not?!  Who would not lock the doors of their home to keep it safe?!  Yet the enemy of human nature is stealthy, tries to build a nest that is not his own and enter in.  Even then, there is a guard at the door of my heart.  For I am never alone.  My own thoughts guide me.  The angels and saints surround me.  And Mother Mary has me under the mantle of her love.  Never fear.  Be of good courage.  Do not lose heart.  Be not afraid.  Trust in the Lord.  These words guide me and guard me. For I am the Lord's and he is mine.

In Jesus' Name. Amen.

"Grace enough"...For Others

February 8, 2020 excerpt from my spiritual journal

The apostles gathered around Jesus, and told him all that they had done and taught.  He said to them, "Come away to a deserted place all by yourselves and rest a while."  For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat.  And they went away in the boat to a deserted place by themselves.  Now many saw them going and recognized them, and they hurried there on foot from all the towns and arrived ahead of them.  As he went ashore, he saw a great crowd; and he had compassion for them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd; and he began to teach them many things.  Mark 6:30-34

Even in our tiredness, there is always a need.  And that which is strongest in us will prevail.

Help for others is always there.  Love and compassion that come from the Heart of Christ is always there within us, and when the moment is right, He is there, with His power and strength, to help us in all of our needs.  Discernment and wisdom, the Word of God, the desire to serve with a heart of compassion and love, all this will prevail over the fatigue and tiredness that come from the trials of life.

The Lord will prevail for He is Goodness and Truth Himself and His Heart knows no other way.  Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.  Trust in the Lord.  Amen.

Ignatian Rules for Discernment, First Week Rules [313-327] 
[320] Seventh Rule.  The seventh: Let him who is in desolation consider how the Lord has left him in trial in his natural powers, in order to resist the different agitations and temptations of the enemy; since he can with the Divine help, which always remains to him, though he does not clearly perceive it: because the Lord has taken from him his great fervor, great love, and intense grace, leaving him however, grace enough for eternal salvation.

*Source

DRAW ME INTO YOUR FRIENDSHIP, The SPIRITUAL EXERCISES

David L. Fleming. S.J.

The Seventh Rule Discernment of Spirits, Father Timothy Gallagher OMV

What is the Office of Consoling? [224]

August 7, 2019
One month anniversary of (my) Mom's passing

"She who gave birth to you is no longer here. The closest tie you can have on this earth has been broken."
deep sadness, time of grief, grieving.

These are the thoughts that come to me today.

Prayer

Thank you Lord, for the gift of my mother.

Thank you for her love and her grace.

Thank you for all that she has done for me, and for all now that she will do for me in her place in heaven.

I ask you to bless her, and to hear her prayers for us.

Keep her strong in your eternal Kingdom, with Dad and all who are with her.

I love you, Lord.  I love you.

My heart is full; there is both love and pain there, living side by side.

I give you my heart Lord, I give you my pain, my sorrow, my sadness.

Never have I felt such sadness as now.  It weighs heavy upon me, upon my soul, yes, but also upon my body.

I give you this Lord, all of it.

And I wait.  I wait for your strength, your joy, your solace, your comfort.

And when it is my time, I pray for your comfort for those I love, those I too will leave behind.  Give them your Love now Lord, that they may bear it in due time.

For your sake Lord, not for mine. That they will turn to you, and love you, not for what you will do, but for who you are, our loving and caring God.

In Jesus' Name

I pray. Amen.

Thank you Lord, for this time, for this prayer. Amen.

(Reflection today on the Canaanite woman, who shouted to the Lord for her daughter)

Matthew 15:21-28

I have been feeling exhausted, heavy in body, mind, spirit.

As I spoke to the Lord about my child, praying for him, the Lord gave me to understand that I was still grieving.  It has only been one month since mom passed.  Today is the first month anniversary.

Each day I think of calling her, so I miss this.  My sister too has mentioned this to me, and I am sure that we are all feeling this.

As I read the Scripture, I asked the Lord to speak to me. "Speak, Lord, your servant is listening."

Here and there in this journal (that I am writing in now) which I had given her years ago for Mother's Day, are Mom's notes from her garden thoughts, her plans, what she has done, her wishes and instructions.

My grieving is interspersed with garden wisdom.  This is also how she fed our bodies, our thoughts, our souls, our spirits - even to the end - with words of wisdom, love, encouragement.

Thank you Lord. Thank you.

I hear these words in my heart,

"The Canaanite woman came to me with all the desires of her heart for her child, and I heard her and answered her prayer - Shall I not also hear and answer your prayers for those you love?

Trust in me my child; Trust in me."

Thank you, Lord God.

Encouraging words in my persevering prayers for my children, and for all for whom I pray.  The Canaanite woman shouted; my prayers are like this.

She kept shouting.

I keep praying.

Thank you for this encouragement, Lord.

Amen.

I read the French meditation for today, August 7, 2019, in Prions en église,

"Welcoming takes two!  On her part, the Canaanite woman welcomes Jesus with her mentality and the hope that she nourishes in her heart.  For his part, Jesus listens attentively and with respect. and he discovers that, as pagan as she is, a deep faith lives in her, which opens her up to his work in her life."

I sit in the quiet, as I feel a filling in my heart, Peace and Comfort, a bubbling feeling in my heart, my breastbone area.  I welcome you, Lord. I welcome you. Amen.

And I feel peaceful and rested now, a smile coming from within is now on my face.

Thank you Lord. Thank you.

A beautiful healing has taken place, a lightening, a lifting of  heaviness, a sadness, a pain. Thank you Lord Jesus.

Thank you.  Amen.

[224] Fifth Point. The fifth is to consider the office of consoling which Christ our Lord bears, and to compare how friends are accustomed to console friends.

In contrast to the passion, I should note how much the divinity shines through the person of Jesus in all his appearances. The peace and the joy which he wants to share with me can only be a gift of God.  To realize that the role of consoler which Jesus performs in each of his resurrection appearances is the same role he performs now in my life is a faith insight into why I can live my life in a true Christian optimism.

DRAW ME INTO YOUR FRIENDSHIP by David L. Fleming, S.J.

The Spiritual Exercises

A Literal Translation & a Contemporary Reading.

[218] The First Contemplation
How Christ our Lord appeared to Our Lady
[224] Fifth Point (as above)

What does it mean to 'consider' for oneself?

May 10, 2019
"The Jews disputed among themselves, saying, "How can this man give us his flesh to eat?"
John 6:52-59

As I reflected on this Scripture, the Lord spoke to my heart, saying that many do not accept this truth, that they hear it, but they reject it.  He said, "You believe, and so you have life in you."

I was reminded of the words the Lord brought to me on August 11, 2011, when I prayed about being a Minister of Communion.  He had said to me, "There is nothing more desirable in this world, than to offer my Body to eat to another. There is nothing more desirable."

I was filled with gratitude that I have this privilege of being a Minister of Communion.
And I thanked the Lord.

Today, in my devotional, Mary Day by Day, Saint John Eudes speaks of Mary's heart being "a book", and the Prayer speaks of "the science of salvation" found in Mary's Immaculate Heart.

I thought - the Lord took flesh from Mary and this flesh is also part of Jesus.  This unity of human flesh and Holy Spirit, Divinity in Jesus, constitutes truly the science of salvation we have in Jesus Christ, fully human, fully divine.
It is truly the gratitude of the Easter Vigil's Exsultet
"O happy fault
that earned so great, so glorious a Redeemer!"

Filled with peace and gratitude, I  read the Exsultet in my Triduum booklet...
O truly blessed night
when things of heaven are wed
to those of earth
and divine to the human...

and I prayed...

O Mary most wise, help me to contemplate the science of salvation found in your Immaculate Heart.  Grant that I may imitate you in all things, for you were the perfect follower of Jesus.
Amen.

The SPIRITUAL EXERCISES of Saint Ignatius of Loyola
[2] Second Annotation 
DRAW ME INTO YOUR FRIENDSHIP, David L. Fleming, S.J.
... 1 The second is that the person who gives to another the way and order in which to meditate or contemplate, ought to relate faithfully the events of such contemplation or meditation, going over the points with only a short or summary development. 2 For, if the person who is making the contemplation takes the true groundwork of the narrative and, discussing and considering for himself, finds something which makes the events a little clearer or brings them a little more home to him - whether this comes through his own reasoning, or because his intellect is enlightened by the divine power - he will get more spiritual relish and fruit, than if he who is giving the Exercises had much explained and amplified the meaning of the events. For it is not knowing much, but realizing and relishing things interiourly, that contents and satisfies the soul.

The Exsultet in song, Proclamation of the Easter Vigil

excerpt from Exsultet, found in the Triduum for Easter Vigil liturgy
"This is the night
when Christ rose victorious from the underworld.
Our birth would have been no gain,
had we not been redeemed.

O wonder of your humble care for us!
O love, O charity beyond all telling,
to ransom a slave you gave away your Son!

O truly necessary sin of Adam,
destroyed completely by the Death of Christ!

O happy fault
that earned so great, so glorious a Redeemer!

O truly blessed night,
worthy alone to know the time and hour
when Christ rose from the underworld!

This is the night
of which it is written:
The night shall be bright as day,
dazzling is the night for me,
and full of gladness.

The sanctifying power of this night,
dispels wickedness, wastes faults away,
restores innocence to the fallen,
and joy to mourning,

O truly blessed night
when things of heaven are wed
to those of earth
and divine to the human.

On this night of grace,
O Holy Father,
accept this candle, a solemn offering,
the work of bees and of your servants' hands,
an evening sacrifice of praise,
this gift from your most holy church.

Therefore, O Lord,
we pray you that this candle,
hallowed to the honour of your name,
may persevere undimmed,
to overcome the darkness of this night.

Receive it as a pleasing fragrance,
and let it mingle with the lights of heaven.
May this flame be found still burning
by the Morning Star:
the One Morning Star who never sets,
Christ your Son,
who, coming back from death's domain,
has shed his peaceful light on humanity,
and lives and reigns for ever and ever. Amen"

This is the Easter Candle, seen now in a new way, thanks be to God!

What is a meditation with the three powers?

February 12, 2019

Scripture readings for the day:
Genesis 1:20-2:4a Six Days of Creation and the Sabbath; In the beginning...
Psalm 8 'What are human beings that you are mindful of them?'
Mark 7:1-13 'You abandon the commandment of God and hold to human tradition.'

As I reflected, this came to me;
'God has given you everything, yet you put in place rules for men, for whom everything was created, and to whom also everything has been given.'

In my Mary Day by Day book of meditations, I was struck that in my state of life, as wife, as mother, I ask Mary to obtain all the graces I need, and to help me to cooperate with them faithfully.

The Lord has given me a task, the Go Fund Me project for my son, and I put rules and requirements in place for him in my mind, and I do not do anything because I am anxious.

I am no different than the Pharisees in this Gospel reading of Mark.  Thank you, Lord. I shall move forward now in this. Please help me to be obedient to your will. Amen.

Go Fund Me project for my son Devon:
Help Single Dad Heal From Violent Attack

[50] First Point. The first point will be to bring the memory on (the Scriptures in this case), and then to bring the intellect on the same, discussing it, considering it; and then to move the feelings more with the will (and then to prayer).  (Paraphrased)
Spiritual Exercises of Saint Ignatius of Loyola.  First Week
[45] It is a meditation with the three powers.

Book: Mary Day by Day
Minute Marian meditations for every day of the year, including a Scriptural passage, a quotation from the saints, and a concluding prayer.  With an introduction by Rev. Charles G. Fehrenbach, C.SS.R.
ISBN 9781937913076

What is the First Colloquy in the Triple Colloquy?

Poem
Encounter with Mary in the Three Part Colloquy [62]

I get all wrapped up
in the veils
of my Mother's presence.
I hear the swooshing
of her garments
As she passes me by.
I feel the hems
of her garments
brushing over my feet.
She also is near
and comes to help me,
puts her hand
on my breastbone,
and speaks gently to my heart.
I am her child
And she is my mother.
Thanks be to God
for this indescribable gift.
Amen

"I went out by night...and I inspected the walls of Jerusalem that had been broken down..." 
Nehemiah 2:13a

May 23, 2016, excerpt from my spiritual journal

'What is the Wall of Mary like in your life?'   'The Wall of Mary.'
These words kept coming to me this past week.
I felt led to read Nehemiah's story of his scrutiny of the walls of Jerusalem, by examination of them by night.  The Book of Nehemiah is about the rebuilding of the walls of Jerusalem, but it is also a story about the walls that need to be in place, or rebuilt, around our hearts.

I am in the midst of a family crisis.
I prayed the Rosary all night. I prayed all the mysteries of the Rosary:
Joyful, Sorrowful, Glorious, Luminous.  The true Rosary, before culture got so busy.

'You have rebuilt your Wall of Mary.'
'You have rebuilt the Wall of Mary in your life.'
I heard these words...then...

'Just as a mother holds as treasures in her heart,
the memories of her child's life,
so too my Mother holds in her life,
the Mysteries of my life.

When you hold the treasure of the Mysteries of my life
in your life,
you have rebuilt The Wall of Mary
in your life.

The Wall of Mary consists of the Mysteries
of my life and hers.
These are the Mysteries of my life.
When you contemplate my life,
you see your life in mine.'

'This is the Wall of Mary that must be built into the life of every believer.' 

[147] First Colloquy. One colloquy to Our Lady, that she may get me grace from her Son and Lord that I may be received under his standard; and first in the highest spiritual poverty, and - if his Divine Majesty would be served and would want to choose and receive me - not less in actual poverty; second, in suffering contumely and injuries, to imitate Him more in them, if only I can suffer them without the sin of any person, or displeasure of his Divine Majesty; and with that a Hail Mary.

The Spiritual Exercises of Saint Ignatius of Loyola
Second Week; The Fourth Day: Meditation on Two Standards.

How can I prepare for future desolation?

...last night's course, leading the group through the Examen Prayer...
(taken from my spiritual journal...)

As I looked at my day, my gratitude came from the evening's DVD session.

My heart was touched a few times, but most especially as I listened to Father Gallagher telling the story of the life of Saint Elizabeth Seton.  The part where I felt moved was when he spoke about her experience in the country and how the Lord had filled her with His love, and that she knew God to be her true Father, how she stayed with the Love of His Presence with her.

Each time I hear of the saints' encounters with the Lord, the Lord touches my heart, perhaps to show me how very real His Presence is in my life as well.

As I continued to look back on my day to see where the Lord wanted me to 'stay' a while, I remembered my walk with Jack (my husband) down to the river yesterday.  I also recalled the words the Lord brought to me the day before: to focus my attention on our life as a couple.  He had shown me the previous day that it is very simple, easy, to show my love - as Jack himself said to me years ago and what has stayed with me - that words are easy, but that it is what we do that shows love.  I can take walks with him, cook very simple meals that are pleasing to him, other things as well that are simple but show love and care.

And the Lord said to me that He was pleased:  I had made Jack's almost favourite supper, pizza (a healthy recipe), and also that we had gone for a good walk together.

Now what I understand is that this, my strengthened relationship with Jack, this is where I will be strengthened for the trials ahead.

And I also recall that the Lord has said to me that Jack is the sign to me that I am not alone, and that He is with me.

This is the sign to the world that God gives us in marriage: as my husband is with me, so too God is with me, and will never abandon me.

Thank you Lord Jesus.  You know me more than I know myself.  I have asked you to strengthen me for the trials ahead, and you have shown me that it is in my very relationship with my husband that I will be strengthened for the trials of life.

Thanks be to God!  Amen.

Tenth Rule.  The tenth: let the one who is in consolation think how he will conduct himself in the desolation which will come after, taking new strength for that time. (323)

The Soul of Elizabeth Ann Seton, a Spiritual Autobiography

Discerning Hearts - scroll down to listen to audio teaching on the Tenth Rule, as presented by Fr. Timothy Gallagher

Dreams and visions in Spiritual Direction

A little background...
First prophecy of the Passion

Jesus began to make it clear to his disciples that he was destined to go to Jerusalem and suffer grievously at the hands of the elders and chief priests and scribes, to be put to death, and to be raised up on the third day. Then, Peter took Jesus aside and said, 'No this must not happen to you.'

How many of us have said the same thing when we heard that something not so good was going to happen, or was happening, to ourselves, or to someone we loved?

And Jesus tells Peter that the way he is thinking is man's way, not God's way.  'If anyone wants to be a follower of mine...let him take up his cross and follow me.'  Matthew 16:21-25

The Transfiguration
" Six days later, Jesus took with him Peter and James and his brother John and led them up a high mountain where they could be alone.  Then in their presence he was transfigured: his face shone like the sun and his clothes became as white as the light.  Suddenly Moses and Elijah appeared to them; they were talking with him.  Then Peter spoke to Jesus, 'Lord,' he said 'it is wonderful for us to be here; if you wish, I will make three tents here, one for you, one for Moses and one for Elijah.'  He was still speaking when suddenly a bright cloud covered them with shadow, and from the cloud there came a voice which said, 'This is my Son, the Beloved; he enjoys my favour.  Listen to him.' When they heard this, the disciples fell on their faces, overcome with fear.  But Jesus came up and touched them.  'Stand up,' he said 'do not be afraid.'  And when they raised their eyes they saw no one but only Jesus.

As they came down from the mountain Jesus gave them this order, 'Tell no one about the vision until the Son of Man has risen from the dead'. "
Matthew 17:1-9

How close is heaven and earth!

Only a vision away.

I am always amazed at what transpires in prayer.  The Lord is indeed ever near.

Here, my life is hard.  There is, of course, much joy and beauty - the joy of playing dolls and make-believe with my grandchildren, the joy and love of hugs, my dear husband, my children, my family, my friends - but there is also pain: my daughter-in-law's illness, three years now, and all the ups and downs of daily life.  A plane has disappeared, and the whole world is wondering, and suffering, along with the families and friends of these dear loved ones.

A mystery to us, but not to our God.  May the Truth of Jesus Christ be in this situation for all concerned!

My life too can be mystery.  I don't know what is ahead.

But sometimes, if I am attentive, the Lord will give me a glimpse of something.  It can be as simple as a vision of a sink overflowing because a plate has blocked the dishwasher's flow of water from going down the drain (I didn't pay attention to that one!).  It can be as complex as a dream about a job cut and a letter of farewell dictated in the night.  Read about that one here...

When my Dad died I had a dream.  I dreamed that I was in an empty room.  I had the sense that it was a waiting room.  There were two doors in the room, on opposite sides of each other.  One door opened, and my Dad came into the room.  He came to me and took me into his arms.  I put my arms around him and held onto him.  Not a word was said.  I knew in my dream that he had passed away, but the one thing that was very real to me, was how solid he felt in my arms.  He was real, and I felt very comforted.  Then, just as quietly as he had come, he let go of me and left through the other door.  I knew in my mind that he had to go.  But the peace and comfort of his presence stayed with me.  The next morning, I spoke to  my Mom.  I didn't mention to her right away what had happened to me.

She told me that she had had a dream.

My Dad had come to her.  The room was filled with light.  He took her into his arms and they danced and talked.  It was wonderful she said.  Then he left.

Because of my dream, I was able to be present to my Mom with hers, and to tell her that the Lord loves her so much He gave her this special gift.

We will see my Dad again, but I have here, now - through recollection - a place to feel comfort.  The dream, the vision, is always given for a purpose.  For my Mom and I, it was given for comfort and sustenance, for hope and promise.

As it was for the disciples.

As we begin our Lenten journey, let us ask God to open the eyes of our hearts.

The Lord is very near.

How close is heaven and earth?

Only a vision, a dream, a consolation away.

See Chapter 10. Divine Administrator - A Prophetic Word